OK monkeys time to stuff your eyeholes with truth bananas... or something...
SO, today i tried my hand at something new... CANDY MAKING!!!
Firstly i have been delving the ancient texts on the dark art and learning all i can about tempering sheen and all the stuff that goes particularly with CHOCOLATE yeah i said CHOCOLATE!!!
last year y uncle was craving something called Almond bark from Disneyland- They stopped making it so he was a bit bummed... this year i went all out and i wanted to share my thoughts experiences and general ideas about the experience.. here goes!
Firstly lets get the deets outta the way... I made a batch of milk chocolate almond bark and a batch of the more popular peppermint bark.
::the ingredients::
24 oz. of milk chocolate chips OR MELTING CHOCOLATE the latter WAY easier to find but any milk chocolate will do.
12oz. bag of slivered almonds (NOT SLICED) or anything you wanna drop in this...
24 oz. white chocolate chips OR MELTING WHITE CHOCOLATE same as above
1 pound bag peppermint candy or 1 doz Candy canes or any hard candy you wanna add...
::tools youll need::
pyrex glass bowl
spoon or spoonula
large cookie sheet (with sides)
parchment or waxed paper
refrigerator
microwave
resealable containers.
first you want to clean your mixing bowl really well, then youll want to rinse it off and dry it as best you can, water will seperate milk chocolate and i found a great way to start off the melting AND make sure the bowl is water free... I have an 1100 watt microwave, so I dried the bowl and put it in the microwave for 2 minutes to ensure the water was evaporated off the bowl - amazing side effect, the bowl became pretty warm to the touch!
NEXT
Used the warm bowl to start the melting process of both bags of chips.
Place bowl in the microwave at 20 second intervals stirring after each time until all the chips are melted... now you want to go easy from here... you want to keep heating the chocolate but NOW at 10 second hits until the chocolate is liquid (about the consistency of honey or a little thicker...)
you will also want to get ready any and all things you want to add for the almonds we toasred them in the oven at 350 moving them around every two minutes for about 10 minutes *you'll smell the almonds when they are starting to toast make sure they are a golden brown.
Now add the almonds (or whatever ) to the chocolate folding it in making sure its evenly distributed through the chocolate.
place parchment on the cookie sheet and start to pour the chocolate out of the bowl and into the cookie sheet. spreading it evenly, once spread i take the cookie sheet and lift it a little and drop it to "tamp"" the chocolate and remove any bubbles.
place in the fridge for 90 minutes. once cooled and re hardened, break apart in whatever size you want and place in resealable container. lasts about a week.
For the peppermint bark you want to do the same thing, only watch the heating more closely as the main thing in white chocolate is cocoa butter chemically its all sorts of different and can "set up" on you in no time. follow the above steps only youll end up with more of a cake batter consistency with the whie chocolate. if yo uoverheat the chocolate at all it will clump up and be all sorts of nasty looking... start again.. rule of thumb take it slow 10 to 20 seconds in the microwave!!!
if you are using a double boiler... Keep a closer eye on the melting.
so thats it this yeilded three large rectangular tupperware bowls of pieces roughly the size of a quarter candy bar.
enjoy!!!
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
DCUO Goes to the Free to Play (FTP) setup...
Hello Web Monkeys!
Interesting thing happened as i was cruising my PSN store the other day, I found out that DCUO had gone free to play...
Now for those of you out there that have NOT experienced this genre of game... It falls into the MMORPG... or MMO... or MMOG... or online game category - truthfully the genre has been used to label any game that has an initial cost and some sort of "payment option" in it - think Dungeons and Dragons with snazzy graphics and MIRC chat... Still not sure? Sorry can't help you - stop reading now and go download it, or go play a FB game (if the FB game confuses you...Nevermind...)
Of course i had purchased this game at the behest of a friend Robert, who literally spent release week doing nothing BUT playing... Finally i purchased the game and started my online adventure in the DC universe...
The Superhero online roleplaying game genre has a few notable titles worth mentioning as they sort of helped shape DCUO in some form... City of heroes/villains/wombats/titty twisters/whatever they are adding this week... and Champions Online... As i have paid for all three i can give yo my insight on these I feel pretty objectively, not because I'm better at it, but because i feel i am not playing favorites. I gave all three 60 days to convince me to stick around - below is the findings from each.
City of Hero's/Villains:
The first real offering I heard of for the superhero game was this one. Pretty standard issue MMO you installs your game you gets your Plastic out and you gets your free month...
Character creation was amazing! so much so its the only real part of the game i recall having fun with... past that i remember the game overall just being almost ridiculous in scale, what i mean is there seemed to be more "outside" than anything else... Quests seemed a bit blah... All i really got out of it is "cool you have an epic costume..." The game overall just didn't engage me or i didn't engage it, and i recall a LOT of complaining...
Champion's Online:
So this game was also recommended by Robert, I picked it up after playing 1 day of a free trial, convinced that this was gonna be unbelievable... Boy, was i right on that... CO gave you a pretty awesome costume setup, a really nifty 50-60s storyline type feel, but that's about as far as i felt i got into it. Same thing most of what i remember was the character setup... That and TONS of really lame superhero names... I mean you're playing a superhero who's gonna call XxtommylikeshamsammichesxX??? I digress - people who have no imagination sadly seem to like these games - and while this is something small to most folks... i REALLY think that games should police this more often... i mean if you are going to have a snarky name at least be inventive about it OK? OK where was I, oh yeah... Leveling... BORING - enemies... unimaginative and BORING looks... the game went almost reverse of COX...it seemed TOO sandbox y... and the NPCs were TOO vague... All in all i just felt like there was just too much emphasis to say "we're SO not COH" which makes a lot of sense... go read about it on wikipedia if you want to know more about these two games, its actually quite funny! That and the customer service sucked so so so very bad, I hadn't even broke out of my trial, had already added my keys and CC and i was already bored with the game... I called up for options... I was curtly informed "we don't do refunds at all" and told to have a pleasant day then disconnected... Customer Service to me is as important as the game itself... I felt very disregarded like "we got your money piss off!" this one thing will kee me from buying any more IPs from this company...
DC Universe Online:
Ok let me get this VERY big Gripe out of the way... to ME adding the term "online" to ANYTHING is about as annoying as adding "Mc" to items on the McDonalds Menu or Apples legacy of "i" stuff - WE GET IT... every time i hear an ad for "high speed online" I want to smash my Adams apple with a crowbar... SO when i heard the announcement for DC Universe Online, you can imagine the Cluster headache i gave myself, then the Virgo kicked in... and it applied in this case and i got over it... However - INTERNET ACCESS MEANS YOU ARE ONLINE... THERE IS NO HIGH SPEED OFFLINE YOU FREAKING IDIOTS JUST CALL IT HIGH SPEED INTERNET OR HIGH SPEED WEB ACCESS OMFGWTFBBLROFLLOL!!!!!!!!1!111! OK 'nuff said.
Where was I?
DCUO - right... So remembering Meridian 59 and EQ1 and lots of MUDs.I keep finding this one little grain of truth. The games that last the longest do two things well:
They have an immersive mythos/storyline.
They Don't require you to upgrade your system every 6 weeks...
That being said, Let focus on the first part of this... how much more "comic book" or "nerdy" or "USA-centric" can you get than Superman, Batman, and Wonder-woman. I mean c'mon! EVERYONE knows these names right??? Amazingly this transferred over well to Character creation, where you get to pick one as a mentor (there are villains as well, but I'm more of a glass half full kinda guy, not a My glass can be changed to take over the world and steal all the hostess pastries in it! (bonus if you get the reference!)) then get into the rest of the creation process... Now DCUO isn't as extensive as the above games, but it still offers a lot more options than say World of Warcraft... Here's the catch that almost made me cry... you get your character all gussied up, pick your epic color scheme (because color is as important as your name) log into one of the best tutorial instances i have seen complete with voice over acting that i swear are the same actors as many of DCs movies... and you get some new gear - and SUDDENLY ALL THAT AWESOME TIME YOU SPENT IN CHARACTER CREATION IS LOST BECAUSE YOU PUT ON NEW ARMOR!!!! I picked the halter top on my female because she had huge boobies and now all that cleavage is covered in off world tech armor FAH Q SONY!!!1! I HATE YOUR EFFING GAME!11!1 Oh... You can change the look of your gear in the appearance section WHILE IN GAME? The colors too??? This to me was one of the BEST options in the game... Now i could mix and match tech armor, demon armor, and druid armor and not look like some time traveling demon-druid with bad taste in costuming, this to me is an option i think should be found in every game... Even WoW could learn from this!!! Of course past your initial costume you have to collect "looks" by adding them from the various items you pick up... a few of theyse sets mix and match well, so you get to sort of have a mini game in that alone... And yup you guessed it, achievements exist for donning new looks. Graphically, the game is very pretty, and doesn't add too much to your clocks on you PC - i think this is for two reasons: 1. the game ports exactly over to the PS3, but i don't if you have mouse and keyboard mapping there ( I played ot for an hour on my PS3 and the contoller setup IS intuitive, but i still like Mouse Keyboard I tried playing with my 360 controller on the PC and the same thing.. while it is intuitive keyboards are just almost a must with MMOs ... 2. They use a lot of really cool tricks for manipulating the surrounding, load times are uber low when going into a new area... but you still still see peoples characters "load" in some places... other than that about as clean as WoW.
So why didn't i continue to play? Well after a few days really hitting it hard i had 2 characters at 20+ and rapidly running out of content... Other things came into play, like a social life outside the house, and here we are! Why is it different now? Honestly I think its because I'm NOT paying for it monthly... I dint feel obligated or entitled" to play, so its less pressure. that and the DLC content is not TOO shabby not overly priced and the game uses Sony cash so you can use it on other stuff if you don't use it on DCUO - i will admit though... the DLC s currently a lil "meh". gameplay overall is a bit off the beaten path relying completely on mouse/controller "aiming" and combination button pressing - for instance one of my favorite moves requires me to LMB, the hold LMB - then hold RMB to finish... this is one of like 5 i have for combo attacks and they link together pretty easily, THEN you have all your hotkey actions so for the above lets say I'm fighting Solomon Grundy while doing the Poison Ivy quest line? A few "metahumans( i LOVE that word say it with me Meh-Tuh-Hyoo-Mens VERY GOOD )" join up and we go after him... So, lets follow my attack - I stealth (batman is my mentor and the games options and experiences change according to who you're a fanboi of) and i roll up on him and hit him with sort of a backstab, then ill hit him kick him unload six arrows into his face, THEN i start in on the hotkey hits... taser him, sticky bomb him, hes now stunned do a quick buff up and then drop choking gas - and were only 5 seconds into the fight - and i still have like three other combos and hotkey attacks (called loadouts) i can use... add this to the nice quick role switch and you can see how the fighting at least gets a lot more tricky than 1,1,1,2,3,4,4,1,4,5,wait for cooldowns... its actually pretty awesome... fights are very dynamic! the even more insane thing is for healer types heals do both damage and heal simultaneously.
The downside to this going FTP is also the boon of it going FTP - people are flocking to the game and there are log in queues - most people HATE this, but I'm kind of relieved. It appears Sony took a page right out of Blizzards Play Book and underestimated the response to this setup and the servers have been agonizingly getting shut down more then they are up it seems, but when you get 120 thousand new gamers and 300 thousand total logging in at once on two mega servers, you're gonna have some issues. Sonys dev. team and management have handled the issues with as much transparency and grace as they can, but for those of you who are in the know, you know that its always the most ignorant that yell the loudest... or the "Snowflakes"...
The setup is pretty awesome actually - for those players that want "legendary accounts" you pay 14.99 a month and you get basically unlimited everything. For players that actually spent he cash on the game and have a "key" you get some limits - you only get six characters per server (plenty for the roles you'll need.) you can only have 2000 dollars on your character and everything else goes into escrow. the free to play bunch get 2 character slots, no email transfers and very limited monies. Other than that all the content is the same as well as the character customizations. All the accounts are upgradeable. So really you get out what you put in. In all it seems very well thought out. There still is that feeling of entitlement with the legendary/premium players against the FTP players... But i think its more ignorance and frustration of the servers failing as of late.
In closing, I think there are a lot less savory MMOs out there on the FTP side, with lots less back story and pretty lame production values... DCUO is really good IP with a strong story and amazing game play overall. Best of all its 100% free!!! You can do a LOT worse than this game. If you have any questions ping me and ill do my best to answer ya!
~Dan
For any that play: Bloodmoon USPCPVE
Interesting thing happened as i was cruising my PSN store the other day, I found out that DCUO had gone free to play...
Now for those of you out there that have NOT experienced this genre of game... It falls into the MMORPG... or MMO... or MMOG... or online game category - truthfully the genre has been used to label any game that has an initial cost and some sort of "payment option" in it - think Dungeons and Dragons with snazzy graphics and MIRC chat... Still not sure? Sorry can't help you - stop reading now and go download it, or go play a FB game (if the FB game confuses you...Nevermind...)
Of course i had purchased this game at the behest of a friend Robert, who literally spent release week doing nothing BUT playing... Finally i purchased the game and started my online adventure in the DC universe...
The Superhero online roleplaying game genre has a few notable titles worth mentioning as they sort of helped shape DCUO in some form... City of heroes/villains/wombats/titty twisters/whatever they are adding this week... and Champions Online... As i have paid for all three i can give yo my insight on these I feel pretty objectively, not because I'm better at it, but because i feel i am not playing favorites. I gave all three 60 days to convince me to stick around - below is the findings from each.
City of Hero's/Villains:
The first real offering I heard of for the superhero game was this one. Pretty standard issue MMO you installs your game you gets your Plastic out and you gets your free month...
Character creation was amazing! so much so its the only real part of the game i recall having fun with... past that i remember the game overall just being almost ridiculous in scale, what i mean is there seemed to be more "outside" than anything else... Quests seemed a bit blah... All i really got out of it is "cool you have an epic costume..." The game overall just didn't engage me or i didn't engage it, and i recall a LOT of complaining...
Champion's Online:
So this game was also recommended by Robert, I picked it up after playing 1 day of a free trial, convinced that this was gonna be unbelievable... Boy, was i right on that... CO gave you a pretty awesome costume setup, a really nifty 50-60s storyline type feel, but that's about as far as i felt i got into it. Same thing most of what i remember was the character setup... That and TONS of really lame superhero names... I mean you're playing a superhero who's gonna call XxtommylikeshamsammichesxX??? I digress - people who have no imagination sadly seem to like these games - and while this is something small to most folks... i REALLY think that games should police this more often... i mean if you are going to have a snarky name at least be inventive about it OK? OK where was I, oh yeah... Leveling... BORING - enemies... unimaginative and BORING looks... the game went almost reverse of COX...it seemed TOO sandbox y... and the NPCs were TOO vague... All in all i just felt like there was just too much emphasis to say "we're SO not COH" which makes a lot of sense... go read about it on wikipedia if you want to know more about these two games, its actually quite funny! That and the customer service sucked so so so very bad, I hadn't even broke out of my trial, had already added my keys and CC and i was already bored with the game... I called up for options... I was curtly informed "we don't do refunds at all" and told to have a pleasant day then disconnected... Customer Service to me is as important as the game itself... I felt very disregarded like "we got your money piss off!" this one thing will kee me from buying any more IPs from this company...
DC Universe Online:
Ok let me get this VERY big Gripe out of the way... to ME adding the term "online" to ANYTHING is about as annoying as adding "Mc" to items on the McDonalds Menu or Apples legacy of "i" stuff - WE GET IT... every time i hear an ad for "high speed online" I want to smash my Adams apple with a crowbar... SO when i heard the announcement for DC Universe Online, you can imagine the Cluster headache i gave myself, then the Virgo kicked in... and it applied in this case and i got over it... However - INTERNET ACCESS MEANS YOU ARE ONLINE... THERE IS NO HIGH SPEED OFFLINE YOU FREAKING IDIOTS JUST CALL IT HIGH SPEED INTERNET OR HIGH SPEED WEB ACCESS OMFGWTFBBLROFLLOL!!!!!!!!1!111! OK 'nuff said.
Where was I?
DCUO - right... So remembering Meridian 59 and EQ1 and lots of MUDs.I keep finding this one little grain of truth. The games that last the longest do two things well:
They have an immersive mythos/storyline.
They Don't require you to upgrade your system every 6 weeks...
That being said, Let focus on the first part of this... how much more "comic book" or "nerdy" or "USA-centric" can you get than Superman, Batman, and Wonder-woman. I mean c'mon! EVERYONE knows these names right??? Amazingly this transferred over well to Character creation, where you get to pick one as a mentor (there are villains as well, but I'm more of a glass half full kinda guy, not a My glass can be changed to take over the world and steal all the hostess pastries in it! (bonus if you get the reference!)) then get into the rest of the creation process... Now DCUO isn't as extensive as the above games, but it still offers a lot more options than say World of Warcraft... Here's the catch that almost made me cry... you get your character all gussied up, pick your epic color scheme (because color is as important as your name) log into one of the best tutorial instances i have seen complete with voice over acting that i swear are the same actors as many of DCs movies... and you get some new gear - and SUDDENLY ALL THAT AWESOME TIME YOU SPENT IN CHARACTER CREATION IS LOST BECAUSE YOU PUT ON NEW ARMOR!!!! I picked the halter top on my female because she had huge boobies and now all that cleavage is covered in off world tech armor FAH Q SONY!!!1! I HATE YOUR EFFING GAME!11!1 Oh... You can change the look of your gear in the appearance section WHILE IN GAME? The colors too??? This to me was one of the BEST options in the game... Now i could mix and match tech armor, demon armor, and druid armor and not look like some time traveling demon-druid with bad taste in costuming, this to me is an option i think should be found in every game... Even WoW could learn from this!!! Of course past your initial costume you have to collect "looks" by adding them from the various items you pick up... a few of theyse sets mix and match well, so you get to sort of have a mini game in that alone... And yup you guessed it, achievements exist for donning new looks. Graphically, the game is very pretty, and doesn't add too much to your clocks on you PC - i think this is for two reasons: 1. the game ports exactly over to the PS3, but i don't if you have mouse and keyboard mapping there ( I played ot for an hour on my PS3 and the contoller setup IS intuitive, but i still like Mouse Keyboard I tried playing with my 360 controller on the PC and the same thing.. while it is intuitive keyboards are just almost a must with MMOs ... 2. They use a lot of really cool tricks for manipulating the surrounding, load times are uber low when going into a new area... but you still still see peoples characters "load" in some places... other than that about as clean as WoW.
So why didn't i continue to play? Well after a few days really hitting it hard i had 2 characters at 20+ and rapidly running out of content... Other things came into play, like a social life outside the house, and here we are! Why is it different now? Honestly I think its because I'm NOT paying for it monthly... I dint feel obligated or entitled" to play, so its less pressure. that and the DLC content is not TOO shabby not overly priced and the game uses Sony cash so you can use it on other stuff if you don't use it on DCUO - i will admit though... the DLC s currently a lil "meh". gameplay overall is a bit off the beaten path relying completely on mouse/controller "aiming" and combination button pressing - for instance one of my favorite moves requires me to LMB, the hold LMB - then hold RMB to finish... this is one of like 5 i have for combo attacks and they link together pretty easily, THEN you have all your hotkey actions so for the above lets say I'm fighting Solomon Grundy while doing the Poison Ivy quest line? A few "metahumans( i LOVE that word say it with me Meh-Tuh-Hyoo-Mens VERY GOOD )" join up and we go after him... So, lets follow my attack - I stealth (batman is my mentor and the games options and experiences change according to who you're a fanboi of) and i roll up on him and hit him with sort of a backstab, then ill hit him kick him unload six arrows into his face, THEN i start in on the hotkey hits... taser him, sticky bomb him, hes now stunned do a quick buff up and then drop choking gas - and were only 5 seconds into the fight - and i still have like three other combos and hotkey attacks (called loadouts) i can use... add this to the nice quick role switch and you can see how the fighting at least gets a lot more tricky than 1,1,1,2,3,4,4,1,4,5,wait for cooldowns... its actually pretty awesome... fights are very dynamic! the even more insane thing is for healer types heals do both damage and heal simultaneously.
The downside to this going FTP is also the boon of it going FTP - people are flocking to the game and there are log in queues - most people HATE this, but I'm kind of relieved. It appears Sony took a page right out of Blizzards Play Book and underestimated the response to this setup and the servers have been agonizingly getting shut down more then they are up it seems, but when you get 120 thousand new gamers and 300 thousand total logging in at once on two mega servers, you're gonna have some issues. Sonys dev. team and management have handled the issues with as much transparency and grace as they can, but for those of you who are in the know, you know that its always the most ignorant that yell the loudest... or the "Snowflakes"...
The setup is pretty awesome actually - for those players that want "legendary accounts" you pay 14.99 a month and you get basically unlimited everything. For players that actually spent he cash on the game and have a "key" you get some limits - you only get six characters per server (plenty for the roles you'll need.) you can only have 2000 dollars on your character and everything else goes into escrow. the free to play bunch get 2 character slots, no email transfers and very limited monies. Other than that all the content is the same as well as the character customizations. All the accounts are upgradeable. So really you get out what you put in. In all it seems very well thought out. There still is that feeling of entitlement with the legendary/premium players against the FTP players... But i think its more ignorance and frustration of the servers failing as of late.
In closing, I think there are a lot less savory MMOs out there on the FTP side, with lots less back story and pretty lame production values... DCUO is really good IP with a strong story and amazing game play overall. Best of all its 100% free!!! You can do a LOT worse than this game. If you have any questions ping me and ill do my best to answer ya!
~Dan
For any that play: Bloodmoon USPCPVE
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
What are they thinking?!?!?!
So i go to check the mail and get the latest news on yahoo( i should know better) and there is an article on how foods cause a choking hazard in children... i continued to read the article and they specifically state that manufacturers of certain cylindrical shaped foods and hard candies should be redesigned...
Ummm, they go on to site the Hotdog... now... i don't wanna sound like a fucking know-it-all- but if you take the hotdog and you change it to a different shape- say- you flatten it out... you get BOLOGNA - fix't!
on the topic of hard candies "they should be made flat"... wait for it... JOLLY RANCHERS DOES THAT!!!
Whats the latest from the banana and the pickle? HAve nuts chimed in? Are we on the verge of attacking fruit because of its genetic shape? hey I think a flat banana for nanner and peanut butter sammiches would be neat... kills the sundae though... and i can just simply slice the banana up... JUST LIKE A HOTDOG...
In short, if your child has a habit of gagging on hotdogs or candy, perhaps hotdogs and candy aren't what little Suzy and Billy need to be eating - but asking a food industry to make more user friendly food? seriously - the idea of hard candy being small in shape is why?to make it easier to eat?
TEACH YOUR KIDS TO CHEW PEOPLE WE ARE NOT GOING TO SEE LIFESAVERS WITH A LINE ATTACHED TO YANK IT OUT OF YOUR THROAT IF YOU GAG ON IT!!! Learn how to suck on a piece of goddamn candy!
This is why Americans have kids that grow up to be whiney douche nozzles!!! Let a kid get a scrape, a bruise, a broken arm or TWO, gag on candy or choke when they have half a hotdog shoved in their gob! I promise they will be no more messed up for it than going through life in a kneepad and antibacterial gel shell they call parenting right now... Maybe, they'll even turn out like you want them to.. OH THE HORROR! BE A PARENT!!!
In closing it think its great that we have people that think about kids, and their needs . But some people take it too far, kids learn by experience - sometimes not always for the best - sometimes not always the way we want - but we have to draw a line on where other people get to make decisions for us regarding our offspring... I know some people NEED that guidance, but most do not.
If you teach your kids to eat like a human, the risk that these "professionals" are referring to all but goes away. most of you who DO read this ate hotdogs and candy and any various other small things and cylindrical things as kids - hells i still remember my mom cutting up hotdogs for my little brothers and sisters not one gag! ok maybe one or two... but Mom was there to defend your life from the evil that is the hotdog...
Saturday, December 5, 2009
NEW SCIENTIFIC TEST!!! Is Making a Thanksgiving meal REALLY stressful?
I'd like to start this off by saying thank you to all the Mythbusters™ For reminding me remember that High School Science was not only fun, but can be made into one of the funnest shows on the planet and be directly applied to my daily world (MINUS THE EXPLOSIONS AND HIGH POWERED ITEM OF THE WEEK).
I'd like to also thank my Boss (well recent boss) K.A. Unger, for food blogging (ill add the Blog addy at the end of this - my blog - for you to read its A-MA-ZING!!! And for all the people that will read this... We're about to go down in history (well ok more like oblivion) in what i think is going to be possibly one of the most upsetting and enlightening experiment EVER!!
The Myth - Cooking thanksgiving (or holiday) meals is stressful.
The experiment - Cook a 14 pound turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes and gravy FROM SCRATCH and see how it affects me throughout the day physically, and mentally. I will be taking my blood pressure and noting my general feelings. Cranberry sauce, Green Bean Casserole and other assorted goodies will not be present as they are already in large lots in the fridge...
The Control - this is my FIRST EVER TURKEY, this means that everything I'm doing with said bird is new to me. Basing the taste texture and generally nom-ness of the made items against roughly EVERY thanksgiving dinner i have had...
9AM startup... Through the magic of the internet I will be fast forwarding to the actual prep and cooking and posting every 60 minutes or so on my findings. Checked Blood pressure which is at normal. As per her request, after finding out my intentions I call my mother on the phone so that she may impart her wisdom upon me. Which turns into her more or less talking about my sisters inability to park a car and how there is snow in her hair and my grandmother... After she gets off the phone the birds prepped and put into the over at 375 for 20 minutes ... after the 20 minutes the bird is covered in aluminum foil and then cooked at 325 for 20 minutes for every pound of turkey = roughly 4 and three quarter hours. Check my heart rate and BP slightly elevated due to Moms ranting. back in twenty.
10:00 - 11:00 AM Turkey baster split... umm space age plastics FTL! Using spoon... Heart rate and BP fine... Several cuss words used. Mental state is slightly annoyed... My mom has had the same old Betty Crocker turkey baster since I was like 5 and uses it every year... I buy one and I get half a use out of it... yeah I'm a bit annoyed... Off to the store maybe... Still using a spoon. Can't see trying to use anything else at this point a long cooking spoon seems to be doing the job... a little concerned that my aluminum foil cover is not right... all that can happen is that ill have to use more gravy on the turkey... right???
11:00 AM- 12:00 PM The Familiar scent of turkey is now wafting through the house and is every bit as intoxicating as it was last week... Turkey seems to be cooking well Aluminum seems to be doing its thing and as a whole I feel very good about it all. Stuffing and mashed potatoes are going to be easy on a level which i cannot even describe! the turkey gravy will also be an easy thing to do... heart rate still low, mental state now mellow again, cats are chasing one another around. I'm running some quests in WoW... I'd have to say.. completely stress free... FYI i am cooking this and there will be other people tasting it... however I'm not too stressed about that either... Life seems relatively good! The stress theory or Hard time theory seems to be wearing thin...
12:00 - 1:00 PM Adding pic from 12:30 Basting Dear Lord... I know why mom was the way she was! You can use this turkey making thing like a super power!!! (please note the scientist in me wanted to take pics of all the steps... the procrastinator in me forgot to charge the camera battery...) Doesn't this just look freakin' amazing?!?!?! Even the Kitten is giving me the "look".
So yes some of you are seeing the "dark meat"areas starting to "pull" that's ok though, this will most likely end up sandwich meat and the other side looks fine... this is a NON touched up pic! Love how the steam is just coming off the turkey YUM! Heart rate a little accelerated...Due to the awesome turkey before me... That wing annoys me... it will be the first thing I engulf when said turkey is done... just for splitting like it did!
12:00 - 2:00PM not too much happened in this time frame so I compiled it...
Basting as normal, no chnage in heart rate or stress level.
2:00 - 3:00 Turkey is done!!!
I start to remove it and the breast literally separated from the bird... Pulse jumped a but, not to fear! Thge Breat removed i was able to basically remove the thighs the legs and all the rest of the mean into easy Light of dark meat :) so no pic of the bird in its current render... However i can tell you after tasting thei meat and also sampling some to the roommate it was clear that tonight will be amazing and that tomorrow will start yet another bout of Triptephen buzzes... Damn I'm good!!!
Thanks again To My Mom for sticking in there with me!!!
FINAL analysis -
Dinner is made and people will be enjoying it later. On the whole, this has taught me a lot, but if anything I feel less stressed now on the other side heart rate still relatively the same and aside from a baster failure... Life is good... Dishes and cooking utinsels are cleaned - I'm gonna have to call this myth busted!
So Moms, be warned... We know now SCIENTIFICALLY that your cooking is not stressful unless you make is stressful ;) but we still love when you cook and fuss!!! Thanks again Moms for all the awesome Thanksgivings we Love you... But we know now :)
I'd like to also thank my Boss (well recent boss) K.A. Unger, for food blogging (ill add the Blog addy at the end of this - my blog - for you to read its A-MA-ZING!!! And for all the people that will read this... We're about to go down in history (well ok more like oblivion) in what i think is going to be possibly one of the most upsetting and enlightening experiment EVER!!
The Myth - Cooking thanksgiving (or holiday) meals is stressful.
The experiment - Cook a 14 pound turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes and gravy FROM SCRATCH and see how it affects me throughout the day physically, and mentally. I will be taking my blood pressure and noting my general feelings. Cranberry sauce, Green Bean Casserole and other assorted goodies will not be present as they are already in large lots in the fridge...
The Control - this is my FIRST EVER TURKEY, this means that everything I'm doing with said bird is new to me. Basing the taste texture and generally nom-ness of the made items against roughly EVERY thanksgiving dinner i have had...
9AM startup... Through the magic of the internet I will be fast forwarding to the actual prep and cooking and posting every 60 minutes or so on my findings. Checked Blood pressure which is at normal. As per her request, after finding out my intentions I call my mother on the phone so that she may impart her wisdom upon me. Which turns into her more or less talking about my sisters inability to park a car and how there is snow in her hair and my grandmother... After she gets off the phone the birds prepped and put into the over at 375 for 20 minutes ... after the 20 minutes the bird is covered in aluminum foil and then cooked at 325 for 20 minutes for every pound of turkey = roughly 4 and three quarter hours. Check my heart rate and BP slightly elevated due to Moms ranting. back in twenty.
10:00 - 11:00 AM Turkey baster split... umm space age plastics FTL! Using spoon... Heart rate and BP fine... Several cuss words used. Mental state is slightly annoyed... My mom has had the same old Betty Crocker turkey baster since I was like 5 and uses it every year... I buy one and I get half a use out of it... yeah I'm a bit annoyed... Off to the store maybe... Still using a spoon. Can't see trying to use anything else at this point a long cooking spoon seems to be doing the job... a little concerned that my aluminum foil cover is not right... all that can happen is that ill have to use more gravy on the turkey... right???
11:00 AM- 12:00 PM The Familiar scent of turkey is now wafting through the house and is every bit as intoxicating as it was last week... Turkey seems to be cooking well Aluminum seems to be doing its thing and as a whole I feel very good about it all. Stuffing and mashed potatoes are going to be easy on a level which i cannot even describe! the turkey gravy will also be an easy thing to do... heart rate still low, mental state now mellow again, cats are chasing one another around. I'm running some quests in WoW... I'd have to say.. completely stress free... FYI i am cooking this and there will be other people tasting it... however I'm not too stressed about that either... Life seems relatively good! The stress theory or Hard time theory seems to be wearing thin...
12:00 - 1:00 PM Adding pic from 12:30 Basting Dear Lord... I know why mom was the way she was! You can use this turkey making thing like a super power!!! (please note the scientist in me wanted to take pics of all the steps... the procrastinator in me forgot to charge the camera battery...) Doesn't this just look freakin' amazing?!?!?! Even the Kitten is giving me the "look".
So yes some of you are seeing the "dark meat"areas starting to "pull" that's ok though, this will most likely end up sandwich meat and the other side looks fine... this is a NON touched up pic! Love how the steam is just coming off the turkey YUM! Heart rate a little accelerated...Due to the awesome turkey before me... That wing annoys me... it will be the first thing I engulf when said turkey is done... just for splitting like it did!12:00 - 2:00PM not too much happened in this time frame so I compiled it...
Basting as normal, no chnage in heart rate or stress level.
2:00 - 3:00 Turkey is done!!!
I start to remove it and the breast literally separated from the bird... Pulse jumped a but, not to fear! Thge Breat removed i was able to basically remove the thighs the legs and all the rest of the mean into easy Light of dark meat :) so no pic of the bird in its current render... However i can tell you after tasting thei meat and also sampling some to the roommate it was clear that tonight will be amazing and that tomorrow will start yet another bout of Triptephen buzzes... Damn I'm good!!!
Thanks again To My Mom for sticking in there with me!!!
FINAL analysis -
Dinner is made and people will be enjoying it later. On the whole, this has taught me a lot, but if anything I feel less stressed now on the other side heart rate still relatively the same and aside from a baster failure... Life is good... Dishes and cooking utinsels are cleaned - I'm gonna have to call this myth busted!
So Moms, be warned... We know now SCIENTIFICALLY that your cooking is not stressful unless you make is stressful ;) but we still love when you cook and fuss!!! Thanks again Moms for all the awesome Thanksgivings we Love you... But we know now :)
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Not Oompa Loompa - Lumpia Shanghai!
So i'm at work being a diligent employee... *tap tap tap on the shoulder*- I turn around to see my bosses boss... The only statement "where the phuq is my lumpia?!?!". Now you have to understand something... My bosses boss isn't some enigmatic stuffed shirt blow hard with little to no clue of what its like to be me. Not to long ago he got on the floor and knocked shit out mike tysons' punchout style, so hes still got it - not to mention hes probably the only boss in the world id follow on a request into fire because he merely asked. In short the man wants lumpia - simple and fair request - he gets lumpia.
Lumpia is something that you make in a batch for a small family and im making it for work. My boss is one person, there are 11 people on my team plus my boss - so 13 people. then there's the second later shift team. so possibly 25 mouths will be wrapped around my lumpia at some point. *** THAT WAS A JOKE you PLEBIAN!!!!***
A lumpia to me is what would happen if an egroll and taquito got it on in the back of a '72 Nova and had a kid. more directly think a longer skinny eggoll with mostly meat and spices, you get the idea. so it takes afew to get you "Full"...
With that in mind, im making as many as i can:
The issue? prep for this is like something from "behind the scenes of Iron Chef"
today ill get to hitting several stores in preparation for this "Event"
Let me break this down ;)
Ill need:
100 lumpia wrappers
afew pounds of various meats
spices
oil
eggs
other various stuff
and some time.
The Breakdown
make all the lumpia tonight (granted the whole week is OT)
get up early and cook it tomorrow morning BEFORE work...
Then head into work with said morsels and hope for the best.
Now what can go wrong? This is my first solo project with lumpia.
So im a little nervous about it :) should be ok though.
*bonus notes
Plebian - 1533 (n.), 1566 (adj.), from L. plebius "of the common people," from plebes "the common people" (as opposed to patricians, etc.), perhaps from PIE base *ple- "to be full" (see plenary). Slang shortening pleb is attested from 1865 (see plebe).
* so i called you a snowflake HEHEHE
Stay Tuned - for the actually lumpia factory!
Signed,
The Supreme Commander of Paraguay
Lumpia is something that you make in a batch for a small family and im making it for work. My boss is one person, there are 11 people on my team plus my boss - so 13 people. then there's the second later shift team. so possibly 25 mouths will be wrapped around my lumpia at some point. *** THAT WAS A JOKE you PLEBIAN!!!!***
A lumpia to me is what would happen if an egroll and taquito got it on in the back of a '72 Nova and had a kid. more directly think a longer skinny eggoll with mostly meat and spices, you get the idea. so it takes afew to get you "Full"...
With that in mind, im making as many as i can:
The issue? prep for this is like something from "behind the scenes of Iron Chef"
today ill get to hitting several stores in preparation for this "Event"
Let me break this down ;)
Ill need:
100 lumpia wrappers
afew pounds of various meats
spices
oil
eggs
other various stuff
and some time.
The Breakdown
make all the lumpia tonight (granted the whole week is OT)
get up early and cook it tomorrow morning BEFORE work...
Then head into work with said morsels and hope for the best.
Now what can go wrong? This is my first solo project with lumpia.
So im a little nervous about it :) should be ok though.
*bonus notes
Plebian - 1533 (n.), 1566 (adj.), from L. plebius "of the common people," from plebes "the common people" (as opposed to patricians, etc.), perhaps from PIE base *ple- "to be full" (see plenary). Slang shortening pleb is attested from 1865 (see plebe).
* so i called you a snowflake HEHEHE
Stay Tuned - for the actually lumpia factory!
Signed,
The Supreme Commander of Paraguay
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Disclaimers.
So,
This is the first Blog of probably very few in the long line of Random Acts of Dan Series. That being said lets get a few things out of the way:
1. No animals were hurt in the making of this Blog - If they were they probably deserved it!
2. If the facts aren't right - I'm ignorant - I can admit it, why can't you?
3. Spelling, punctuation, grammar, and syntax are and can be replaced by my own at any time without notice for any reason without notice - If i decide to use my own words and you can't decipher them. Well, perhaps all those years as a military code breaker WEREN'T worth it after
all - chances are you've made worse mistakes ;)
4. If you can't laugh you need to leave now - if you can't take a joke - find witless humor not to your liking, or run ons for no good reason - again leave now!
5. Nothing in this blog will be politically, socially, societally, religiously, or mentally correct - any appearance that it is is strictly coincidental and completely unintended.
6. this line left intentionally blank.
Why am I here?
Simply put, This is an experiment... I was told by a friend I should be a comedian, or that I was funny, or maybe that I smell funny, and people laugh behind by back... ENOUGH! back to the point! In any case I find myself with an extreme amount of time in some cases and decided this may be a healthy way to express myself and also bone up on my typing... which is dreadful! In either case here we are you, me, and the dull glow of the monitor, and the hum of your PC fans and the downloading bar of Pr0nz... wait, strike that. in any case the experiment. hopefully there will be some chuckles, maybe there will be some tears, and maybe ill rant about some keyboard flexing half-wit who wants to gripe about my baseless boring and seriously horrible blog... Jokes on you! You ACTUALLY READ IT !
What's next?
Well over the course of the next few weeks ill be letting you into the mind of an less than average, socially inarticulate, uncomfortable, thirty somethings life... You may laugh. You may call the cops and have them watch me. And just hopefully you'll find out something about me. stay tuned.
Signed,
The King of Sweden.
This is the first Blog of probably very few in the long line of Random Acts of Dan Series. That being said lets get a few things out of the way:
1. No animals were hurt in the making of this Blog - If they were they probably deserved it!
2. If the facts aren't right - I'm ignorant - I can admit it, why can't you?
3. Spelling, punctuation, grammar, and syntax are and can be replaced by my own at any time without notice for any reason without notice - If i decide to use my own words and you can't decipher them. Well, perhaps all those years as a military code breaker WEREN'T worth it after
all - chances are you've made worse mistakes ;)
4. If you can't laugh you need to leave now - if you can't take a joke - find witless humor not to your liking, or run ons for no good reason - again leave now!
5. Nothing in this blog will be politically, socially, societally, religiously, or mentally correct - any appearance that it is is strictly coincidental and completely unintended.
6. this line left intentionally blank.
Why am I here?
Simply put, This is an experiment... I was told by a friend I should be a comedian, or that I was funny, or maybe that I smell funny, and people laugh behind by back... ENOUGH! back to the point! In any case I find myself with an extreme amount of time in some cases and decided this may be a healthy way to express myself and also bone up on my typing... which is dreadful! In either case here we are you, me, and the dull glow of the monitor, and the hum of your PC fans and the downloading bar of Pr0nz... wait, strike that. in any case the experiment. hopefully there will be some chuckles, maybe there will be some tears, and maybe ill rant about some keyboard flexing half-wit who wants to gripe about my baseless boring and seriously horrible blog... Jokes on you! You ACTUALLY READ IT !
What's next?
Well over the course of the next few weeks ill be letting you into the mind of an less than average, socially inarticulate, uncomfortable, thirty somethings life... You may laugh. You may call the cops and have them watch me. And just hopefully you'll find out something about me. stay tuned.
Signed,
The King of Sweden.
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